Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Getting real

Well, for those of you who know me, know that I value real hearts, and real relationships. So starting life here has been hard. Because I want to be personal with everyone. But with a language barrier, it makes it hard to do so. Also the cultural barrier as well. Not only as an American, but a Hispanic American. So what I have been feeling lately is a bit of loneliness. Weird you might think. I have a great host family who encourages me. I work in an environment where there are tons of loving people. Yet, I feel by myself at times. It's the starting a new life, in a new place I guess. No one really knowing who I am. No friendships with any kind of history. God has been hitting me hard in this area, in my times alone with him. At times I feel really sad. I anticipate the day when I can have a family of my own and not be alone anymore. But there will be times when I will feel alone in those times too. But, there is the side of me, let's call it the Holy Spirit, who knows to well, that God can work through me very well in my loneliness and singleness.

I know that all this will take time, and it's perfectly normal to feel lost in the beginning. After all, God works best with those who don't feel like they know it all. I think he calls it being humbled.

There are some financial needs coming that I need to address. I have found a motorbike to purchase for transportation. I am getting ready to enroll in a language school, to learn Thai formally. I have started to learn with a tutor two days a week. Also starting to come up with ministries with the men and women in the area. So pray on it. But if you know that you heart is connecting with the ministry here and want to support it, just email me. God Bless

2 comments:

  1. "At times I feel really sad."

    That made me sad :( It's hard to feel like you're a foreigner when you juss wanna go deep with people. Been there and it sux! One thing to feel lonely when you're you're alone. It's another thing when you're surrounded by people and alone. That's loneliness on a whole otha level. I'll lift u up friend.

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  2. So glad you are writing a blog now, I have you in my blog reader so I will get all of your updates.

    Although I can't relate compeltely, I can sympathize with you-I bet the lonliness is very difficult. Especially coming form somewhere where everyone knew you and you had many deep relationships.

    Praying for you always :)
    Carisa

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